Saturday, April 19, 2008

Is Your Cat Multi-Lingual? If so, Services Needed!

As a fun "hobby" I have been participating in the cat's community on Yahoo Answers. It's quite habit forming, but a lot of fun. The other day I ran across a question and answer that just had me rolling on the floor, laughing out loud. I had to share the question and answer with friends, who also found themselves having a good belly laugh, so I thought I would share them on the blog this morning.


The questioner may be referring to a Russian Blue cat.

"I bought a cat from Russia and now I am having a communication problem. I guess it only speaks Russian because whenever I ask it if its hungry it doesn't reply. I asked my other cats to talk to it but they don't know Russian either. Does anybody know where I can find local Russian cat translators? I don't know what this cat needs and the language barrier is putting distress throughout my family of cats.

I am a 23 year old dude with a cat family and nobody seems to take this problem seriously. This language barrier is causing turmoil within my kitty family."

And the response by a very clever and resourceful Yahoo Answer cat lover.

"The Department of Homeland Security has cats from all over the world in place to help in situations such as yours. Because terrorists can look like anything or anybody, they and the Immigration and Naturalization Dept must be ready with Translator Cats(dogs are available). These cats are from Turkey (Turkish Vans), Iran (Persians), Tibet (Himalayans),Russia (Russian Blues), and other countries such a Singapore(Singapura) and even Britain (British Blues) for example.

Being that your cat is Russian, however, they may want to assure that he has the proper paperwork in order, or they may try to deport him, as often happens. You don't say where you are from, but if you are close to Brighton Beach in NJ (?) I believe there is a large Russian population that can help translate(this according to the Sopranos). They may exact a large price for the service...

I would just place a Black Russian or White Russian close by while you teach him American Sign Language, if he doesn't like the Vodka, you drink it and give him tuna and water...

This response was chosen as the "Best Answer" with the comment by the asker, "This was very helpful. I hope I can learn what my new Russian cat is interested in. Thank you! "

I thought that this was a most charming and creative interchange between two people who have a stellar sense of humor.  What do you think about their conversation? Leave a comment and let us know your reactions!


Anonymous said...

It always amazes me what wonderful, witty people post on this site! Now if I could just figure out what my "born in the U.S.A" cats are saying I would be happy.

Linda said...

LOL This is hilarious! hee!

Vicki said...

Lordy mercy! I wish I had an answer but since I am laughing so hard I can't think straight, I just don't know what to say.

Anonymous said...

Ah, if only we could all be Dr. Doolittle...

If I could talk to the animals
Learn their languages
Maybe get an animal degree...

Ah yes.


Luvbarbaro said...

LOL!!! That is just hilarious, how creative they both were, especially the Yahoo answer gal (or guy)!! Tnat gets an A+ -- LOL!! It would be nice to know what the heck they were saying (thinking) sometimes though!! :>)


Coin Collector said...

I laughed too! Correction though, Brighton Beach is in Brooklyn NY, just west of Coney Island, and yes, there is a HUGE Russian population there. Nice to see a humorous post every now and again that also makes you think!

Anonymous said...

Hmmm...I, too, have a Russian Blue with communication issues. His name is Nick, and his roomie, Grace, is a British Shorthair, and they don't communicate very well at all.

I'm Hungarian/English, so Grace and I get along well, but my husband is a Scot. We just can't seem to get into Nick's head.

So he just marches to his own drummer!


RP Cathouse said...

I love the article! But now my 2 cents. I once bought a Maine Coon kitten from outside the United States. When she arrived at Dullas airport, I am not sure what launguage she spoke, but whatever she was communicating to me totally made me knew that she had fallen in love with me, and she instantly captured my heart.Her name was Freja, she was a brown patch with white and she became my most amazing kitty for the time in which we were fortunate enough to share each other's lives. When she arrived at Dullas airport I am not sure what language she spoke but as I have found the language of love and caring is all it took Yes, language is a road block but love is the road around it. I have had 2 kittens from Capetown, So. Africa and one from Canada also. And have never had any communication problems.

I have found over the years that the language of love and caring is all it takes. A cat or kitten knows if you are faking or lying to them, and you know that is true 99% of the time. I let them see, feel, and know they are wanted and loved and yes they do know when they have pushed my buttons once to often. LOL! I have learned that when one acts like they don't know what I mean or I am saying I know they know better they just don't want to listen.


kasparcat said...

You could call the pet psychic and I'm sure she could lay the groundwork for the cat learning to understand English and you to learn to speak Russian Cattish. Or some common ground.


Fran W said...

No sense in the Cat Dude caterwauling over something that is not in the category of a catastrophe! Rather than becoming cataleptic, he could (if he doesn't have cataracts) consult a behavior catalog to find a catalyst that would put him in the catbird seat in terms of his goal. Surely this isn't a Catch-22, nor would he have to cater to a strict catechism. Let him simply but categorically state that it's time to eat and then teach by example, from the cat's bowl, of course. Then the Reluctant Russian should awaken from his catatonia and follow suit. Having been thus catapulted to success, Cat Dude would then be free to lounge under his catalpa, sail his catamaran, tune up his catalytic converter or indulge in some catnip.

annie! said...

i have always had good rapport with cats. through the years i have probably had several hundred cat friends.

this is such a cute article, and bears reading over and over again.

many thanks for this delightful article!!!